REVEAL THE REVELATION: A BLACK WOMAN ON A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY

I move with the discernment of knowing this country was built against every aspect of my being. That my freedom as a black woman was not given willfully. 

They were legally forced to free me physically,
but then implemented practices of cultural hegemony

that enslaved me mentally and narrated a war that made me the enemy.

Yet, they could never touch me spiritually. 

Therefore I still had the key

and true freedom still found me. 

I am a black woman on a spiritual journey, living in a society that doesn’t make the space or time for either. I struggle just to exist in my natural element. 

It’s not just my melanin that offends you, it’s my energy. A black woman with esteem, confident in her spirituality. The very thing my ancestors were stripped of so vehemently. 

During this black history month, allow me to share this revelation with you all. A revelation that God revealed to me through a black woman’s art (Indigo Taplin). 

1.23.22 - I can remember rushing to get ready. My depression had me in a chokehold that day so I was running a little behind. It’d been a while since I went to a social event and if I hadn’t already bought my ticket to the Spectacular Black Girl Art Show I probably would have bailed last minute on going out. 

I had convinced myself that I lost all sense of social acuity as a result of the 21-month social hiatus I went on in 2019. It helped me spiritually but deprived me socially. Still, I had no idea of the enlightening experience awaiting me at the art show. 

As I drove south down the 101, sitting in the notorious LA self-ablaze traffic pile, I reminded myself it was almost vital that I get back in the motion of socializing with people if I wanted to market my new poetry book, Seen Not Heard. 

The book holding the poetry that expresses the intense, depressive emotions that date all the way back to my adolescent years. Emotions I simply could never express, to anyone.

“Be kind. Be true. Be you. ” - my subtle reminders. 

I pull up to the venue, parallel double parked that MF sideways.

At the door I was greeted with warm smiles from an all black welcome crew who were probably just as happy to finally be in a space with other black creatives in a predominately white area. 

Art. Live music. Creole food. Love.

It was the exact dose of black excellent energy I needed.

We had just finished doing the ole faithful cookout line dance to Before I Let Go by Frankie Beverly & Maze, and of course I was on the dance floor. Yes, the introvert to extrovert dynamic in me is very perplexed as you can see.

I began doing my last look around to see if I wanted to purchase anything else in addition to the jasmine candle I got from House of Mosaic Candles.

There was such an array of beautiful art but as I strolled by Indigo’s booth a specific portrait struck me like lightening in the night when I saw it.

A dark toned man sitting with an upright posture in front of a draped velvet backdrop, which complemented the hue of the blue scarf eloquently styled around his neck. His face was covered with a beautiful assortment of white, orange, and green flowers. 

At first glance I thought to myself how much the portrait embodied the true essence of black renaissance. Confident. Powerful. Strong-willed.

Indigo Taplin, Spectacular Black Girl Art Show.

Carrying immense style and grace, Indigo explained that the portrait was a part of her collection called “Portraits of the Chakras”. Each of the 7 portraits embodied her artistic interpretation of the 7 main chakra energies that we carry as people. 

I didn’t know much about chakras at the time but I had already decided in my mind I was going to buy the portrait. The way my spirit lit up I knew I wanted this specific portrait.

Though I had been on my spiritual journey for 4 years, I paced myself and took a different approach to understanding spirituality.

A way that solely relied on God’s guidance. 

Never deeply researching other interpretations of spirituality or different aspects of spirituality - I simply pray to God to reveal to me what is in His Divine will for me to know and learn.

He hadn’t revealed anything to me about chakras until this day, and while my human mind hadn’t recognized what I was just led to my spirit did. 

The event gave what it was supposed to give and I was thoroughly pleased with my two purchases. I always have to resist the culturally embedded urge to yell out YEERRR when supporting black businesses. It’s just my natural response when I know I’m helping to circulate the black dollar.

“I CAN’T WAIT TO SHARE MY GIFTS WITH OUR PEOPLE AT EVENTS LIKE THIS.”

— NAI YA MAJI

As I walked out of the venue with my frans a thought persisted my mind. A thought that always tends to linger after a black, soulful, creative event, “I can’t wait to share my gifts with our people at events like this." 

Something in me just wasn’t ready to talk about my work yet. I’m sure some of you know what it’s like to have all this passion bottled up but not knowing how to express it. Sometimes it would literally feel like my throat was on fire or get these sharp pains in my chest. 

Even though I already did the “big reveal” on social media, I still could’t seem to find the words to express the significance behind my writings.

Bare in these thoughts, as we walked to the car, I still had little knowing of what was about to be revealed to me.

The next two days I was so out of it.

Sulking because I was supposed to post my first video on my YouTube channel and begin talking about my book. I hesitantly posted the video on YouTube and then decided to put it on private.

It just didn’t feel right. I truly lead with my spirit and something was just off. 

No post. No word. No update on the no post or no word.

how sway, how. 

I had no clue of what to even say. 

I couldn’t explain it to the public because I couldn’t even understand it myself. 

Another public fail. Whew Chile. 

At this point I was getting beyond flustered with myself. Feelings of resentment arose when I thought about so much time spent working with someone who simply didn’t believe in me or my vision. I paid the price for that but this project was moving forward one way or another. 

But even with all the confidence and will to move forward, I just couldn’t understand why I kept getting stuck. 

Another block in the road I just couldn’t make sense of.

I began to plead with God to reveal clarity to me - deliver me of this burden of unknowing. 

I remember talking to God recently, very frustrated and asked Him why have you brought me all the way out here in the deep end just to leave me hanging?

Why you gave me all this knowledge, wisdom, and ideas to share with your people and then not even allow me be able to fully articulate it or even be able to simply express how I feel. 

I began to feel so abandoned. I was completely restless.

Throat Chakra, Portraits of the Chakra’s Collection by Indigo Taplin

As I sat on my living room couch my head fell back, feeling defeated and as I turned to my right I see the portrait I got from the art show. I still didn’t check to see which actual chakra I gravitated to. 

Slight apprehension there because charkas were new to me. I turn the portrait to the back and printed with matte ink on coated paper was a list of the different chakras. My eyes scroll through to find what the blue chakra represented and it said, “Throat Chakra - the Truth and Communication Chakra”

My eyes lit UP, honey. I needed more information. I immediately looked for her website on the back of the portrait and go to her website. 

“Truth. Communication. Truth. Communication.” I kept saying to myself as my fingers swiftly typed away in the google search engine.

Could this possibly be the reason I have been struggling so much to communicate to the public the passion behind my book and what it symbolizes for me spiritually?

I get to her site and click the “Portraits of The Chakras” icon that was at the top of the page and proceeded to the “Throat Chakra” link. 

The Vishuddha Chakra, also known as the Throat Chakra, is 

“The ‘tollbooth between the emotions and the mind.’ You can think of it as the path of communication between the lower chakras to the higher ones. Your creative ideas need the throat chakra energy to be able to find ‘voice’ in the world.” 

It is the chakra that connects our spirit to the earth through words.

My eyes swelled up with water, I was in complete awe.

“Connecting the spirit to the earth through words - expressing your emotions and creative ideas.”

The accuracy was so detailed and precise. This was the clarity I had been asking for from God.

Tears streaming down my face, I was suck just sitting there and as I continued to let it all process, it got even deeper. I realized how this information didn’t just give insight on what I had been feeling lately, it was reflective of how I had felt all my life. 

“IT WASN’T JUST THE NAME OF MY BOOK, IT WAS THE WORDS WRITTEN ON MY HEART FOR YEARS.”

— NAI YA MAJI

I have gone almost my entire life feeling misunderstood. Seen and not heard. Never expressing how I feel. It wasn’t just the name of my book, it was the words written on my heart for years. 

Ever since I was a young girl people only recognized me for my physical appearance and judged my entire life based on that one aspect of me. 

Never even realizing how I suffered depression for years, quietly. 

“Your life must be perfect because you’re pretty.”

“Your life must be easy because you’re pretty.”

As I got older and became more conscious minded, I just rationalized that as yet another reflection of the outlandish dichotomy engrained in our society.

Those assumptions could explain why I started feeling it was no reason to express how I felt as a young girl — because it was never reciprocated when I did.

As a result, I poured everything out in my poetry, it was the only way I knew how to express what was so deeply inflamed within me - without recollection of why that truly was.

like… was I teaching myself to suppress my thoughts and emotions and only express it through writings instead of expressing it verbally? — which now translates to why I struggle to verbally express my creative thoughts and sentimental importance of my work?

she need some milk.

Whew, CHILE.

It was getting deep.

The truth is one slippery slope.

My mind began to cypher through my entire life experience looking to make sense of everything. I recalled the countless moments where I felt voiceless, literally.

I could be standing there, wanting to speak, almost screaming on the inside but nothing comes out. Not a word. (actually kinda spooky)

Or why it’s always been so much easier for me to speak up for other people but was so kind + passive when it came to speaking up for myself.

It was in these moments when the chest pains and throat pains mentioned earlier usually came into play. I always found myself contemplating on why that is but never spoke on it. 

The tears continued to stream down my face like a broken faucet. I sat there just gazing at the portrait.

I was still in shock. The in-depth correlation, accuracy and timeliness was so prolific, I just knew this was facilitated by no one but God. 

Intuitive guidance proved itself to me yet again. Like how on earth did I just HAPPEN to gravitate to that specific portrait. How was that portrait an embodiment of the chakra that is associated with the exact challenges I’ve been facing all my life and the healing I’ve been needing? Nothing but God.

It was deeper than just an actualization - this was a complete revelation. 

CLICK, CLICK, CLICK, CLICK - another correlation surfaced. 

It reappeared to me that the color associated with the throat chakra is blue, the color my entire brand identity is enveloped in - because of the powerful yet peaceful symbolization that it has and its relation to water, another element engrained in the fabric of my brand.

I don’t believe in coincidences but it became exceeding evident to me that I didn’t just “happen” to gravitate to the color blue in my adult life, more specifically after I began my spiritual journey. 

“MY SPIRIT WAS LEADING ME TO THE SPIRITUAL HEALING I NEEDED ALL ALONG. ”

— Nai Ya Maji

My spirit had been leading me to the spiritual healing I needed all along.  God never abandoned me, I just had to be patient and wait for his divine timing.

I was flabbergasted, short of breath, overwhelmed, all of the above. The way God was moving in my life was astounding to me.

It was a lot to take in but one thing in that very moment became crystal clear to me: I need to heal my throat chakra. 

That not only was my peace of mind contingent on this spiritual healing, the trajectory of my life’s work, that I am eminently passionate about, is also contingent on this healing. 

If I couldn’t learn to speak up for myself how could I speak up for my work?

I found myself stuck working with someone who wasn’t aligned with my work because I was too passive and lenient. I found myself deeply intertwined in a toxic situationship a year ago because I didn’t speak up for myself when the time called for it.

As an empath, I have to be extra careful how far and to whom I extend my kindness and moral empathy to. Boundaries have to be set, period.

It reminded me of when I saw a quote on social media that read, “Are you upset at how someone treated you or are you upset at yourself for how you allowed that person to treat you?”

CHILE, I was being read for filth.

I knew a change needed to be made. Yes, within my brand, but first within myself.

“WHAT HEALS THE SOUL OFTEN OFFENDS THE EGO - THOSE BITTERSWEET TRUTHS WE NEVER KNEW WE NEEDED.”

— NAI YA MAJI

It took about 3 Personal Think Sessions, heavy praying and almost two week’s time to process all this.

What feeds the soul often starves the ego, and in the same way what heals the soul often offends the ego - those bittersweet truths we never knew we needed or are apprehensive about receiving.

After pouring out my praise and glory to God, I had to express my immense gratitude to Indigo. This one portrait now held so much sentimental value to me.

I thought it was truly magical how God can reveal such profound truths to us through art. Through the creative visions he puts on His children’s heart to share. 

I was reminded of the significance behind the deeper pursuit of my spiritual journey - as well as my journey as a conscious artist + writer, to continue the cycle of learning and sharing knowledge through artistic expression.

The spiritual journey is never ending and art never dies. Our soul and our art, both from God, lives forever.

I may be a black woman on a spiritual journey, living in a society that doesn’t make the space or time for me but I WILL use my voice + platform to create the space. 

THE POWER OF GOD - THE POWER OF ART - THE POWER OF THE BLACK WOMAN

I’m intrigued to continue this spiritual journey and learning more about chakras. I’m a newbie in that arena so I’d love any insight if anyone wants to share in the comments!

If you’re new to the world of chakras too, I encourage you all to look deeper into it! I learned that just like a chakra can be blocked, it also can be overactive. Balance seems to be the key, as it normally is in life.

There’s an abundance of knowledge out there to absorb that allows us to heal, grow and evolve into our highest beings.

I’m excited to continue sharing with you all my spiritual journey toward finding the well-watered garden within me that feeds and heals my soul, and I hope to make this a space where you feel comfortable exploring and sharing your own spiritual journey.

As I begin to find the well-watered garden in me,

may you too begin to find the well-watered garden in you. 🌱

Highest Blessings,

Nai Ya Maji

🧚🏾🧠🌱💫